As real estate agents meeting and working with new people all the time, we all want to make good first impression on others. But, sometimes, we simply can’t seem to get out of our own way. A new study published by Social and Personality Psychology Compass indicates just that…our biggest enemy is ourselves. And, because so many of us are overly involved in our own stories and responsibilities, just to get done all we need to get done, we don’t even realize we’re failing to connect with those with whom we want to connect. That failure comes at our own expense; that client will go to another agent who is making a good impression and connection with them.
Here are four tactics to avoid so you don’t come off as an agent a client wants to avoid:
- Humblebragging – disguising your accomplishments in a complaint or in false humility renders you as an insincere and untrustworthy person. It turns out that straightforward complainers and braggarts are perceived as more sincere and more likable than someone trying to conceal their intent to be seen as “awesome.”
- Backhanded compliments such as, “Wow, have you lost weight lately? You look so much better…” really aren’t perceived as compliments at all. Such “compliments” are heard as manipulative and strategic putdowns. Even if you think such comments appear to be fine on the surface, the person on the other end of that comment will likely feel annoyed and/or resentful because she’ll be hearing a negative judgment coming from you.
- Hypocrisy is exaggerating the truth at best and not being honest at worst. Make things easy for yourself from the get-go…tell the truth, keep your word and back up what you say with fact and action that are consistent with your word.
- Hubris is defined as excessive pride, dangerous over confidence, and an overestimation of one’s competence, accomplishments and/or capabilities. In the context of Greek tragedy, hubris towards or defiance of the gods most often led to the person’s death. In the context of real estate, an agent may compare herself to another agent with overly lavish, arrogant statements about herself and overly negative, critical comments about the other agent. Again, make things easy for yourself and don’t compare yourself to anyone. Just be yourself in relation to yourself and not to anyone else.
